Transgender: A Timely Topic

As the New Year begins, I find myself yearning to write. To gather thoughts, ideas, facts and revelations; to jot them down in any form imaginable. Mostly, I write my blog following a meeting of the trans masculine group I’m part of. Over the past month I’ve missed going to Center City two weeks in a row. Once due to overeating holiday foods and the second, because the chill factor was in the single digits.

This has caused me to pause and reflect a bit over my writings from other W.W.C. works and J.W. entries. Always amused and sometimes touched by what can come of a ten minute prompt, I become excited by the mere thought of writing–anything. An email, a note to a friend. Even comments on FB get me to thinking.

This year will be the year of Me. The year where I investigate and image my Self toward transformation. Yes, there’s always the question of “Will I or won’t I.” Have the surgery; take Testosterone. There are many other factors involved. It’s imperative I become as comfortable as possible in my own mind and skin. I’m a guy. Don’t wish to be a man. I’m masculine, yet see myself as bi-gender. A good deal to mull over.

My aim is to be on board with my thoughts and whatever changes my body may or may not take. It’s not important that I write about timely issues and publish the findings. Now. I could roughly come to conclusions on paper and share them with the world. Or not. I will blog and blog and, in doing so, effort toward knowledge and self-acceptance. To rant and vent. To curse and scream and holler. To unravel and then ravel again. To peel the layers of the onion so deep the reader’s eye might burn.

I am blessed. I say this repeatedly because I didn’t always feel blessed. I say it to remind myself to practice humility. To not exude charm and airs but tact and simplicity. To take part in life. To remember: without grief, gratitude, and circumstance, I/We are lacking.

 

 

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About sam davies

I love to write. I have a wonderful partner, G, of 16 years and a kitty named Mango. Only recently reclaimed my transgender Self. All my life I felt like a boy but didn't have a name for what it was I felt. As I travel this journey, I hope to meet others along the way who walk a more different path from the rest.
This entry was posted in Community, Connection, Friendship, FTM, Hope, New Year, Poetry, Uncategorized, Writing/Groups and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Transgender: A Timely Topic

  1. Sherry says:

    Keep on – keeping on. I think of the famous quote from Henry Thoreau. “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Simplify, simplify.”

    We did small group ministry today and the topic was BLESSINGS. It’s good to be aware of what is good in our lives.

    Like

  2. contoveros says:

    Yes, we are nothing but what the Creator breathed life into our souls, be it masculine or feminine. I thought that I had to fight and go to war in order to prove that I am a man. Foolish me, my greatest thrill has come with more gentle activities: reading, writing, singing, dancing and meditating with lovely people such as yourself.

    I want the feminine in me to blossom and take hold, guiding me to where my God set out a plan for me to grow.

    It sounds to me that you are at that place. I got a feeling that you’ll make the right decision for yourself and for others, while learning that this is what was in store for you from Day 1!

    Michael J

    Like

    • sam davies says:

      Yes, Michael, if we are fortunate enough we embrace both the feminine and the masculine and it’s lovely and supporting to know this is what our Creator had in mind for us from the very beginning. Too bad society holds us up to such standards as they keep us from soaking in the true parts of ourselves.

      Like

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